Yesterday I wrote about how I’d like y’all to read what I write.
But, why? Is this just about attention seeking?
The goal shouldn’t be simply, “to be read.” It should be to communicate. I’d like to share something with you. For you to get something out of this. It needs to be about you, too.
The great fear is always that I have nothing to say that’s worth reading. That I won’t be able to express anything in the heartfelt and eloquent way I vaguely daydream about.
I mean, sure, I feel special and all that. I was raised in a nurturing middle class home. To think that I mattered, to think that I have something to offer.
Certainly I must have wisdom and brilliance to share. I’m sure I can fix whatever is broken in your life. In your mind. Just listen to me. I’ll tell you how to do it. How you too can be special. How you can be self-actualized or some shit like that. I’ve got it all figured out.
“God the Holy Ghost is calling out to embrace you. I want you to reach deep into your hearts and your pocketbooks and take his hand.”
I don’t think it’s the worst thing to be intensely self-involved, as long as you have sufficient awareness about it. Even better if you can have fun with it. But I’m all too aware I’m still deeply in denial about my relationship with the truth.
Anyway. For today I just wanted to highlight a problem with the post that stood out to me. (Never mind the problems with today’s post.)